New Blog

Today I created this blog and moved some of the posts from my MySpace blog here. The MySpace blog archive is still available at http://blog.myspace.com/nathanworryaboutitlater - comments included. Its also a MySpace music account, so you can check out some of my new tracks (when I get around to uploading them).

I got a bit sick of the rigidity of the MySpace blog, particularly the fact that only MySpace friends could comment.

Debnam Blackballs Forbiddance

NSW Opposition Leader Peter Debnam today made headlines with his visionary plan to ban the banning of the Australian flag. In a grubby attempt to win some cheap political points from this adroit plan the NSW Greens immediately retorted with a communist plan to ban the banning of bans on flags. The Young Liberals then responded with an intelligent plan to ban the banning of tobacco advertising, but determined that marijuana should remain banned, and the Green Party should also be banned for their plan to ban the bans on it. Still, in amongst all this rotten politicking shone clear the forward-thinking logic of a great and unifying alternative leader.

"Im not prepared to stand back and let our national flag be banned... It's just not on. Next they'll say we can't sing the national anthem at the football."

Our glorious anthem puts the fear of God into the hearts of the opposition. We don't want to run the risk of not being able to sing our great and rousing anthem at the footy, so whoever 'they' are, Debnam's plan to ban them makes sense.

Debnam also promised to end the iniquity between thousand year old sites housing irreplaceable ancient Aboriginal art and spiritually significant artefacts and relics, and plaques outside of RSL clubs. "If you desecrate an Aboriginal site the fine is $11,000; if you desecrate a war memorial it's $2200... That's wrong and we're going to change it."

Debnam stresssed that "as someone who served in the navy and served under the flag" he felt that the time had come for NSW to lend a helping hand to the rest of the nation, and for us to join our fellow man in making a stand to protect the motherland. Debnam wants you as a new recruit.

Debnam's proposal for a national symbols bill includes the following:

- The flag should not be subjected to indignity or displayed below any other, because it is better than any other flag.
- It should not be allowed to fall or lie upon the ground, punishable by public flogging.
- It should not cover a statue, monument or plaque, or be used as a table or seat cover, but can be used as a cape, bandanna, dress, picnic rug or call to arms at music festivals.
- When the flag is raised or lowered, or carried in a parade or review, all present should face it, to make sure nobody steals it. Men should remove their hats and all should remain silent, because the flag hates hats and noise.
- Those who refuse to kiss the flag on request should have the shit kicked out of them by skinheads.

The Flag Thing

http://www.theage.com.au/news/national/ban-big-day-out-not-flag/2007/01/22/1169330794734.html

Warning: The Following commentary does not contain satire, or any of the devices thereof, including, but not limited to, hyperbole, irony, mockery, selection of detail, juxtaposition, euphemism, litotes or any form of understatement. Anyone with a history of aversion to serious comment should consult their doctor before ingesting this article. In the event of offence or outrage, induce vomiting.

The Big Day Out organisers have made a perfectly reasonable policy decision to discourage the exhibition of Australian flags at the Sydney leg of the festival in an attempt to avoid ethnic violence. So obviously the Telegraph and every politician under the sun feels the need to jump in with their two-cents worth in an attempt to score some free points with the proletariat - what a disgraceful bunch of opportunists. What was the Premier's response to this announcement? Thoughtful contemplation of the complex issues surrounding our national identity? Musings on the multi-faceted significance of the flag as a symbol of nationhood? Perhaps an expression of sorrow and a sincere apology that his government has not done more to douse the flames of bigotry in this state? Of course not, his response was as boring as it was predictable. He expressed 'outrage', a thoughtless, meaningless, knee-jerk response to a serious issue, proving just how unimaginative and intellectually bankrupt Australian politics has become.

There have been plenty of occassions where I've decked myself in green and gold and cloaked myself proudly in a gigantic Australian flag, but the BDO doesn't seem like the time or place, especially since its not an Australia Day event this year. The fact of the matter is that the Australian flag is used to incite ethnic hatred and violence. The politicians clamouring to express their disgust at this decision will be the first to point the finger at anyone who isn't white when the violence starts - we already know that Peter Debnam, our alternative NSW Premier, wouldn't mind seeing a few Muslim youths 'rounded up' and summarily punished. We can't keep dismissing violent racist white people as 'hooligans' every time this sort of thing goes down - at some stage it comes time to ponder whether perhaps there are more racist whiteys than we'd like to admit. But hey, in the meantime lets just throw shit at anyone brave enough to fess up to the blinding reality and bring these issues to the fore.

Displays of the flag must be put in proper context. At a cricket match such exhibits declare, "we're Australian and we're going to beat you". In Cronulla they suggest "we're Australian and we're going to beat you up". Anyone who insists that the flag is a 'symbol of unity' should pull their heads from their arses - its got the Union Jack in the corner, a symbol of Anglo pride if ever there was one. Since when did we become so nationalistic? At what stage did we become so convinced of our superiority? We're supposed to come "from all the lands on Earth", yet it seems that no refugee can join the club without a lengthy hazing in prison first. Are we supposed to feel some surge of patriotism this week as we reflect on these things? Or do we just forget about all the negative shit for a while and pretend everything is alright? The last thing I'll be wearing on Friday is an Australian flag. 219 years since invasion doesn't seem like such a great thing to celebrate. I don't think David Hicks will be celebrating either.

Field Day 2007

An article I wrote for Tranzfusion. My journalistic integrity is for sale any time, all it takes is free vip tickets.

http://www.tranzfusion.com/articles/shownews.asp?newsid=6139